


No Dogs on the Moon

by Ellimac



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-12-13 03:49:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11751417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ellimac/pseuds/Ellimac
Summary: Someone got Angus an unexpected present. Now he has to try to keep it a secret.





	No Dogs on the Moon

**Author's Note:**

> written for the prompt "someone gets angus a dog/puppy for his birthday or candle nights, and everyone has to run around trying to hide the dog from the director because No Dogs On The Moon." It got kind of out of hand.

Angus’s birthday was usually a pretty quiet affair, given that his only living relative was his grandfather. But once he joined the Bureau of Balance, somehow everyone found out when his birthday was, and made sure to give the youngest member of the Bureau a wonderful day indeed.

Still, after a long and busy day spent with some of his favorite people (Merle even gave him a hug; admittedly he told him right after that if he told anyone about that, Merle would cast Silence on him so he could never speak again), he was ready for a rest. And he was only a few minutes away from that rest when he entered his quarters and found an unexpected gift inside.

It was something round, covered by a blanket, with a tag that said “To Angus.” There was no indication of who it was from. But after watching it a moment longer, Angus realized that it was breathing.

“Oh, gosh,” he murmured. “I hope it’s not a dog.”

This wasn’t because Angus didn’t  _like_  dogs. In fact, he loved them. But he knew full well that no dogs were allowed on the moon, and if this  _was_  a dog and the Director found out, both Angus and whoever had gotten him the gift would be in trouble. And the dog would have to leave.

Still, he wasn’t all that surprised when he lifted the blanket and found a sleeping puppy curled up underneath it. It was a yellow lab, not older than a few months, and when the blanket moved, it stretched and opened its eyes.

“Oh, boy,” Angus said, even as he opened his arms for the puppy to jump into. “I really hope you’re well-trained.”

\--

The puppy was not well-trained. Angus didn’t get much sleep that night, as he kept having to go comfort the puppy, and clean up its messes, and give it his own food (after he determined that it was safe for dogs to eat, of course). By morning, he realized that there was no way he could do this alone. And of all the people on the moon base, there were only three that he was sure he could trust not to spill the secret.

He tried to find Taako first, but Taako was nowhere to be found. Which, in Angus’s experience, probably meant he didn’t want to be found. So he went to Magnus next, and found him on the quad, stroking Steven’s bowl and quietly humming to the fish.

Perfect.

Angus approached him with his hands behind his back, the picture of innocence. It wouldn’t have fooled Angus himself, of course, but it might fool Magnus, and indeed, Magnus looked at him with no suspicion.

“Hey, Ango,” Magnus said. “Want to chill with Steven and me?”

“Um, actually, sir, I wanted to ask you a question,” Angus said. “And maybe get some advice. Would you mind coming back to my quarters with me?”

Magnus glanced at Steven, who stared back at him, as fish are wont to do. Then he shrugged and carefully tucked Steven away in his pack. “Lead the way, little man.”

Angus led Magnus back to his quarters with mounting nerves. He knew Magnus was exactly the sort of person who  _would_  sneak a dog onto the moon, but what if he took a sudden Lawful turn and took her straight to the Director? He probably wouldn’t, but nevertheless, Angus stopped in front of his doors and turned around.

“Sir, I trust you,” he said. “I’d trust you with my life if it came to it.”

“Ooh.” Magnus hissed a breath between his teeth. “I don’t know about that.”

“That’s not the point,” Angus rushed on, before Magnus could get really into why that wouldn’t be a good idea. “The point is, I trust you, and I hope that you can help me out.”

“This isn’t a life or death thing, is it?” Magnus said, still with a worried expression.

“No! It’s a--a pet thing.”

Magnus’s whole demeanor instantly changed. His eyes lit up, and he smiled so widely Angus was briefly worried he’d hurt himself. “A pet? You have a pet?”

“You can’t tell anyone,” Angus said. “I got her for my birthday and I don’t know where she came from but you can’t let the Director find out.”

Magnus’s voice dropped to a whisper. “Angus. I need you to be straight with me. I know you’re usually a pretty honest kid, but I need it  _especially_  right now.”

Angus nodded, already knowing what Magnus was going to ask.

“Is it a dog?”

Angus nodded again.

Magnus clapped his hands together. “Show me! Show me show me show me!”

Angus opened the door. The puppy--named Lucky, in hopes that her name would hold true--darted out like a furry golden cannonball and slammed directly into Magnus’s legs.

“Inside inside inside,” Angus said, ushering both the puppy and Magnus, who was already clearly besotted, into the room and shutting the door behind them.

Once inside, Angus sat down on his bed and buried his head in his hands. Magnus sat on the floor, letting Lucky jump all over him and lick his hands and face. He had never been happier; that was easy to see.

“She’s already made four messes and I’m running out of beef jerky,” Angus said in a rush. “Her name is Lucky and she has to stay a secret but I can’t do this on my own. I’m too young to be a dad!”

“I’ll be her dad,” Magnus said. “I won’t tell anyone. Except Taako. And Merle. And Carey. And--”

“No!” Angus stood up. “You can only tell Merle and Taako. Nobody else. The more people who know, the more chance the Director will find out. Please, sir, this has to be a secret.”

Magnus looked up for the first time. This time he had a serious look on his face, though he was clearly still delighted with the puppy.

“Okay,” he said. “I won’t tell anyone but Taako and Merle.”

Angus sighed with relief. “Thank you so much. I just don’t know what I would _do_ without you guys.” He could feel tears swelling up in his eyes. “You’re my best friends.”

Magnus gave a quick grin. “Yeah. Sure.”

Lucky licked his face again, her tail going like a leaf in a windstorm. Angus allowed himself a smile, and the thought that this might just work out after all.

\--

That night, Angus answered a knock at his door to see Taako, already giving an anticipatory grin. His eyes slid past Angus and onto the puppy, who was exhausted from a day of playing with Magnus.

“Gimme,” Taako said, moving past Angus to go pet Lucky.

“Can you conjure some food for her?” Angus said. “I don’t know what else I have that she can eat…”

“Yeah, sure, anything you want, Ango,” Taako said absently. “She’s cute. You know dogs aren’t allowed on the moon, right?”

“I know,” Angus said. “That’s why it’s a secret.”

“Is it a secret? Because I already told everyone.” Taako looked up to see the look of horror on Angus’s face and laughed. “Kidding! It’s a joke, Ango. Relax. I didn’t tell anyone. The only people who know are me, Magnus, and Merle.”

“You three are lifesavers,” Angus said, his voice trembling. “I couldn’t take care of a puppy all by myself. And she’ll need to be walked, and toilet trained, and…”

“You’re on your own for toilet training, but Magnus already called dibs on walking her,” Taako said. The puppy had inched her way onto his lap and was now asleep again. “Wow. Guess I’m staying here for the night.”

Angus fell backward onto his bed. “Would you? I stayed up with her all night last night.”

“Sure thing, little man.” Now Taako was scratching behind Lucky’s ears, causing her to lift her back leg to try and scratch there, as well. “Want me to cast Sleep on you?”

Angus didn’t answer. He was already well on his way to sleeping with no help from Taako at all.

\--

Taako, as promised, stayed the night. As an elf, he didn’t need to sleep, so when Angus woke up, he was hanging around feeding pringles to the puppy.

Magnus showed up not long after Angus woke, bringing Merle with him. Between the three of them, they kept the puppy entertained while Angus ate breakfast.

“She’s a real sweetheart,” Merle commented. “Y’know, I’m starting to wonder if the Director’s ban on dogs is just so she can have ’em all to herself.”

“I’m totally willing to break into the Director’s private quarters to see if she’s keeping dogs there,” Magnus said.

“She’s not,” Taako said. “I already checked.”

“Sense Dog isn’t a real spell,” Magnus said.

Taako gave him a sly smile. “As far as _you_ know.”

“It’s not, though,” Angus said.

“Sure it is. I’m Sensing Dog right now.”

“You don’t have to Sense Dog when there’s a dog right in front of you,” Merle said.

There was a knock on the door.

All four of them froze. Angus looked at each of them in turn, but they all looked just as shocked and terrified as he was.

But someone had to answer the door, so Angus cautiously made his way to the door while Magnus tried to hide the puppy behind himself, and cracked it open just enough so he could see outside.

The first thing he saw was a scale-covered face bearing a big grin. Carey. Then he saw the hand on her shoulder, and realized that Killian had come along, too.

He whirled. “Magnus!”

“I didn’t tell anyone!” Magnus said, raising his hands. Lucky leapt out from behind his back to try and lick them some more.

“Hey, don’t worry, kid,” Carey said hastily. “Magnus didn’t tell us. Taako did.”

Now Angus turned to Taako, hurt, as Carey and Killian made their way into the room. Taako, though, glared at Carey and Killian with suspicion.

“I didn’t tell you,” he said.

“Well, not directly,” Killian said with a shrug. “But it was pretty obvious when you said, ‘I gotta go see Angus, not for any reason, but especially not any reason related to dogs,’ right after Magnus charged in and said he had something really important to tell you.”

Angus raised his eyes to the sky and sighed. He could trust his friends not to directly tell anyone about the dog, it was true, but he had forgotten how monumentally awful Taako was at actually keeping a secret.

“Okay,” he said. “Does anyone else know?”

“Not as far as we know,” Carey said, already on the floor happily making friends with the puppy. “It was just me and Killian in the ring. Oh, and Noelle.”

Angus felt his stomach sink. The more people who knew, the more likely it was that the Director would find out. But Noelle wouldn’t tell anyone… right?

The trouble was that, with six people knowing now, the secret was far more likely to get out, even if none of them told anyone. Taako might talk about it a little too obviously in front of the director; someone might catch any one of them going to Angus’s room; one of them might decide to take her for a walk and accidentally let her be seen.

Six people plus the gift giver, Angus reminded himself. If it were any of those who knew, they would have given it away already. All of them were bad liars—at least, they couldn’t lie to Angus. But aside from Magnus, and possibly Taako, Angus couldn’t think of a single person who would have given him a puppy. It just didn’t make sense.

But here he was, with a puppy and six friends and one mysterious stranger in on the secret, and he could no longer imagine a scenario where things turned out fine.

\--

Within a week, it seemed that everyone on the base knew about Lucky, except the Director. _How_ she didn’t know, though, was a mystery to Angus. Johann dropped in and played her a quick tune on the violin (she was entranced). Avi came by and played with her for about five minutes before rushing off with the excuse that he had something very important to do. Brad Bradson even stopped by, though he didn’t stay long either, saying that he was allergic to dogs. Leon the artificer visited, and left in a hurry when he saw that Taako was also there, but stayed long enough to give Lucky a present—a rubber bone that, he assured Angus, had no magical properties whatsoever. (After Lucky bit a hole in it and it immediately repaired itself, Angus began to doubt that.) The only person, it seemed, in the entire Bureau of Balance besides the Director who _didn’t_ know was Davenport.

All in all, though he had a lot more help than he had bargained for, it added quite a bit more stress to his life. So much so that, after the third night of less than an hour of sleep, the Director herself began to notice something was off.

When she stopped him on the quad, he panicked for a moment before she spoke, her voice full of concern. “Angus, I’ve noticed you seem… off, lately. Is something bothering you?”

“Oh, no, Director, I’m fine,” Angus said hurriedly. “I’m just, uh.”

He couldn’t think of an excuse. The Director watched him, waiting for him to finish.

“I’m just not sleeping well,” Angus finished weakly.

“Well,” the Director said, sounding like she didn’t believe him, “if you ever need anything… please feel free to come to me.”

“Thank you, Director,” Angus said, privately thinking that no matter how much stress this whole Lucky thing put on him, he wouldn’t tell her about it in a million years.

\--

With everyone on the moon base knowing, it seemed to be only a matter of time before she found out. But, miraculously, another week passed without her finding out. And then another. And another. By now, Lucky was starting to get bigger, and everyone took turns taking care of her. She was out on so many walks that it was a miracle the Director hadn’t figured it out.

That lasted until the day that there was a knock on Angus’s door, and he opened it to see the Director. Lucky had been trained not to jump on people as soon as the door opened, but Angus was immediately aware that there was absolutely nothing to conceal her from the Director if she chose to come inside.

So he did the only thing he could think of, and scooted outside, shutting the door behind him.

“Uh,” he said. “Can I help you, Director?”

“Actually, I was wondering if I could help you,” the Director said. “You seem… stressed, lately, and I had hoped there was something I could do. Do you want ice cream, or…”

Her earnestness was sweet, but it immediately put Angus on edge. “What… do you mean?”

“I just want to make sure all my employees are feeling well,” the Director said awkwardly. “So if there’s anything I can do…”

Angus could hear Lucky scratching and snuffling at the door behind him. She didn’t like being alone, though thankfully, she didn’t bark much. But there was no way the Director wouldn’t notice if she kept that up. Unless…

On a sudden suspicion, Angus said, “I guess I’m pretty _lucky_ to have a director like you, huh?”

The Director’s expression didn’t change. “I suppose so, yes…”

At that moment, Lucky let out a whine. The Director had to have heard it, but she said nothing. She didn’t even look at the door.

“You know,” Angus said. It wasn’t even a question, but the Director’s eyes widened in faint surprise anyway.

“Know what?” she said.

“About Lucky,” Angus said. “Everyone else knows. I should have known you did, too.”

“Who is Lucky?”

Her feigned ignorance was starting to get on Angus’s nerves. That, combined with the lack of sleep lately, and the stress from trying to keep the dog a secret, was enough to make him snap.

“My dog,” he said. “The puppy I got for my birthday a few weeks ago. You know? Lucky?”

“Angus,” the Director said, “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Don’t you know there’s no dogs allowed on the moon?”

She winked and turned away. “Now, I know you said you’re fine, but the offer still stands. Do let me know if there’s anything I can do for you, Angus.”

And she swept off, leaving Angus gaping open-mouthed after her. After a moment, he turned around and opened his door, letting Lucky out into the corridor.

“I have no idea what just happened,” he said, leaning down to scratch her ears, “but you sure live up to your name, girl.”

Lucky licked his face, and he laughed, his first genuine laugh since his birthday. “Come on, Lucky. Let’s go for a walk.”


End file.
